5 AREAS TO EMBRACE FEMININE ENERGY IN BUSINESS

Today I want to talk about what it means to embrace the feminine energy in business building. I think it’s important before I start to let you know that we are talking about energy here and not gender so I want to clarify that the feminine and masculine principles I’m talking about are not defined by gender or sexual orientation. They are universal energies, principles, or capacities found in all people, systems, and cultures. 

We all possess feminine and masculine energy within us and the balance of these energies is used in many different aspects of our lives. We rely on both of these areas to show up in different ways and for different means.

It may be that we rely more on the feminine energy for the nurture of parenting or maybe our masculine energy comes through more clearly when we are in activism mode, standing up for justice or making our voice heard for issues that matter. I give these tiny non-exhaustive examples to show that both energies are important and have a lot to bring to the table. This isn’t a masculinity bashing podcast episode but an opportunity to explore what each side brings, and particularly to note how defaulted to the masculine we often find ourselves as women running businesses. 

Because business and entrepreneurship has been largely forged and dominated by men, it’s only natural that there is high masculine energy around it, which can make it really difficult for women - especially women who tend to have strong feminine energy - to feel like it is really for them or that they are cut out for it. And yet - we know that any overextended energy that isn’t balanced out will often lead to toxicity. And that’s what we are seeing now in the world of business - men and women who have defaulted too hard into the masculine energy of business and it has led to unprecedented burnout, clambering for status, unhealthy leadership, win at all costs type of ways of working.

For years in business, the masculine energy has typically been held up as being more powerful and effective. The masculine energy pushes through, is assertive, wants to take control of situations. As women (and as men), we can easily see how the qualities of the feminine energy are present in our personal lives, however it still feels like it isn’t welcome in our professional lives or in our work. Our late-stage capitalist culture has overvalued traditionally masculine energy, while denying or undervaluing feminine capacities. So I want to talk through how our feminine energy can actually be some of the most powerful contributions to business right now - contributions that will include a more collaborative, empathetic, creative and receptive way of working. Ways of working that are better for everyone.

I also think it’s important to say that while too much masculine energy in our business can lead to all kinds of problems - it doesn’t mean we don’t need it to be strong negotiators in our businesses, to have clear direction, to look for logic and reason, to implement focus, integrity, structure and stability. All of these qualities of more masculine energy can really benefit us in our work. But an overextension of these and a negligence of the feminine can lead to being mechanical, arrogant, insensitive, power-hungry, and empty in our sense of purpose. 

The feminine energy brings adaptability, intuition, creativity, flow, sharing, patience, vulnerability, empathy, inclusion, and trust to our work. But when we lean on the feminine too hard we can see how it can also lead to immaturity in how we run our businesses -  being overly sentimental, hyper-dependent, reliant on praise, unfocused or irrational.

While masculine energy is oriented towards action, decisiveness, competition, productivity and profit, we are definitely seeing a shift in values coming from the feminine as becoming more important to the wellbeing of us all when it comes to operating a business. When we overextend into the masculine and forget the importance of the feminine energy in business we are giving up some really incredible opportunities to connect, be intuitive, have a greater impact and take people with us.

there are some elements of business that I believe deserve a much stronger dose of the feminine in business building:

1. Conflict: The feminine energy is the best to use when it comes to handling conflict (this can be applied both with internal conflict in yourself or with your work or team mates or clients/customers) - listening carefully, staying in the discomfort of challenge instead of racing to find a quick fix. 

2. Goal Setting: It’s also hugely important to exercise the feminine energy in business when it comes goal setting - staying open and receptive to what matters most as your work evolves instead of fixated on arbitrary goals or targets.

3. Selling: When it comes to selling - being invitational and understanding of the dynamic of potential client/customer vs business dynamic means that you allow relationships of trust to be built instead of having narrow sales focuses that may pay off in the short term but might not lead to repeat or happy customers. The feminine quality keeps a wider perspective around selling and is likely to be curious about: is what I have what the other party really needs? Is this exchange win-win situation? 

4. Generating Ideas: The feminine energy wants us to keep open to being playful about how things can be done. It is open to new perspectives and ideas rather than looking for the most logical or obvious course of action. It is thinking about the bigger picture, greater good again, rather than acting on impulse or shortcuts.

5. Time Management: The way men see time is linear. They go from A to B because that's how they are biologically designed - they have 24 hour hormone cycles. The way that women live is different. We are cyclical creatures. And we have to honor our rhythms. As women, we naturally have waves. We'll be on fire, but then we need some Netflix in the middle of the day. Men tend to operate in 24-hour periods. But women tend to view time over a much longer cycle so embracing that feminine energy can be really useful when working on bigger projects that require more time to develop and land - not feeling that pressure to have the whole thing executed in an unrealistic time frame.

6. Pressure: If the masculine energy is too heavy when pressure strikes in business, the impulses will be to be too self-critical or even harsh with others who might be involved in your work, however if you stay in contact with the feminine energy you are more likely to be able to access self-compassion and understanding.

What we want is to be able to know what areas of the masculine and feminine to bring with us and assert when we need it. Maybe we need to bring more masculine energy to our sense of value when it comes to pricing our work - being decisive and practical about it and then weave the feminine into how we show up and sell it by bringing a receptive, intuitive invitational feel to our offers? You see how they can work so well in tandem and balance with each other to make our businesses stronger?

When we learn how to balance the masculine and feminine within ourselves we become magnetic - there is a sacred union of health between both of these energies that can really serve us well. 

When we default to running our businesses with too much of the masculine energy we can quickly become burned out as we neglect our self-care, overwork ourselves, and forget to experience pleasure, flow and ease.

In reality we are all a combination of both energies, however most of us default to a preference in business and because the system was built in a masculine space, it’s that. And so many amazing women in business are resisting their feminine energy and battling so much imposter syndrome and burnout and many men are denying the feminine energy they could be accessing and depleting themselves and feeling like frauds. 

If you feel a bit impostery or disconnected as a business owner or as an entrepreneur and you feel you are struggling to fully embody your true authentic self in your business, understand that it’s probably because you’re being told you have to be a certain way and are leaning too hard into that default masculine business energy that we’ve been sold as the only way to be a business person. Please know that you do have a choice and you can create a business that embraces both the Feminine and the Masculine energy and use them to build a healthy, regenerative, purposeful business. In fact, it’s important that you do.

5 NEW BUSINESS MANTRAS FOR 2023

Over the last few weeks I’ve been ruminating - allowing thoughts and ideas to come when they’re ready and I usually find when I have a bit more space or margin, I can sense certain things taking shape naturally. I notice that I keep coming back to certain themes within myself, in my processes and thoughts and I notice those things appearing or being talked about more frequently in my calls with groups and clients so I thought I’d share some of them with you today.

I’m calling them Mantras - 5 ideas or ways of being that I really want to hold onto as I run my business and do my work this year. Some of these have been brewing for a while and are finally landing in my head and my heart and I want to offer them to you so you can think on them as well.

The first one is this:

Trust is paramount (in yourself and your clients)

An idea that has never steered me wrong is that I already know what I want. I already know what I want to do, how I want to do it, how I want to develop my work, what I want to earn, who I want to work with and how valuable my offers are. I already know it. And I believe that you know it too for you. However - if it was that simple, we’d all be out there doing it. My intuition is the more innate, true part of me and it has so much wisdom for me but it gets clogged up like a sink with fear, with other peoples opinions, with the noise of social media, with my own protective habits. All of this can clog my intuition but it’s there waiting for me to listen to it because it is trustworthy and it won’t push. My responsibility to myself this year is to make space for it. To face the clogs and dig them out of the way so that my own desires and knowing can flow. 

This goes for my clients or any potential clients too. As a coach, I want to fully trust my clients to show up for themselves and for our work together. I position myself as a reliable, trustworthy person and believe the same for them. I believe they have full autonomy over their decision making and I am not here to cajole or manipulate them into doing anything outside of their own knowing. I trust them to do that clog digging work with me for themselves and operate in their fullest sense of power. Anything less than that is babysitting or codependency and I am not interested in coaching dynamics like that. I totally trust anyone interested in working with me to make the best decisions for themselves about when and how they do that and am only willing to work with people who really trust themselves to begin coaching from a place of empowerment. 

The second mantra is this:

Growth is not measured by numbers, but by depth of trust and impact in your work

I am determined this year to only measure growth and progress through the lens of trust and impact. I feel like this goes against all the traditional advice to be checking numbers and figures and dont get me wrong - those are important too. I’m not working for free - I value myself and my skills too much to neglect the financial side of my business. Make no mistake, I want to earn a living from my work and I do, but I’m no longer going to be sneakily distracted by numbers, followers, subscribers and sign ups. The real metric that matters for me this year is the level of trust I am building in those that have not yet worked with me. Trust that reflects all that I talked about in the first point. Trust that I am someone who values them, trust that I am the right companion to support them in their work. Trust that I have the skills to help them free themselves from restrictive or punitive ways of working. Trust that I can help them to build a truly aligned business. I’ll know this by the conversations I have in DM’s, by the responses to emails, by the good discussions on free strategy calls, and maybe by how many of those people feel empowered to join me in doing this work.

And I want to grow the impact of my work - the depth of which my clients are showing up for themselves and truly finding more freedom and joy in their businesses. I love nothing more than seeing how the tools and resources we use together have lasting impact in their work. I see them staying aligned, bringing in brilliant customers and clients, being loyal to themselves, making hard decisions, optimizing their time and looking after themselves. A lot of people often come to my work through the feedback or sharing of my clients - they tell their friends or colleagues and I love this. It means so much to be able to help people this way.

Thirdly comes this. This year I am focused on

Creating a body of work rather than churning out content.

I want everything substantial that I create to be adding to a body of work that people can utilize or dive into at any time. Relevant, supportive, practical and provoking. I don’t want to get caught up on the content train where I have to perform for a platform that is insatiable for new stuff or stimulation. Social media platforms are noisy and distracting and it’s hard to hear all of the nuance amidst the advice and I love nuance and context so I don’t want to show up there with soundbites that can’t be unpacked with care. I also think it’s pointless to serve up really huge concepts on social media because there is rarely any time for integration or embedding of them. We simply can’t digest all of the well meaning goodness that we are hit with as we scroll. We get a second of a hit of dopamine when we read something that is important or true but then we pass by it and don’t get the chance to think about how it could really apply, so this platform, this podcast and my emails are going to be where I create my body of work that reflects what I really want to say and social media will be a little library snapshot of all of that and point my audience back to here. Viewing what I create as a body of work gives it value for me the creator - knowing that someone can find my work and go back to the beginning of this podcast and listen through as much as they want really helps me concentrate on providing honest, authentic and meaningful content. It also gives me freedom to use social media a bit more playfully, because you know I love a good play on there. 

The fourth mantra that I’m focusing on is in relation to how I show up and offer my work and its this: Everything is an invitation, never an expectation. My friend Michelle taught me this expression and I use it daily to lesson the icky feelings that come up when I think about how to market myself and make sure people know about my work. It can really be this simple. You are always invited - invited to come along, to listen, to contribute to the conversation, to comment, to sign up, to invest but it’s never an expectation. I don’t know you, your circumstances, your capacity, your financial situation, your pressures so I want to approach all of the offers that I have with that knowledge and compassion. Back to trust - I truly believe that anyone contemplating working with me on their business has the autonomy and deserves the respect of never feeling like joining me feels pressured. I want my marketing and selling to feel invitational and so I will leave plenty of space for those decisions, I will follow up with grace, I will invite regularly so people don’t miss it (because people always miss it) and I will be loyal to myself and make sure that I am sending those invitations out and giving people the opportunity to join in in what I have or will create. Always an invitation, never an expectation.

And finally this:

I don’t have to do this alone

I know that my temptation will always be to keep any struggles I have to myself - to not reach out or ask for help. I know my pride can overshadow what I know to be true - that doing any kind of important work to me is always better shared and that there are communities around me that will meet me with support, encouragement, ideas and love. I may be the person most invested in my own work, closest to it and most emotionally and physically connected to it but I know I’m not alone in the similar issues and questions that I have and I have experienced the power of a community of supportive women so many times in my work that I have seen to really show up and cheer each other on and listen to what each other is going through that I want to make sure to activate this for myself as the year progresses. I want that for you as well because I know how powerful it truly is. When we release some of the insecurities we may have of worrying about other women being competitive or of thinking that no one will care - we can really find amazing connection that can propel us forward knowing that us having each others back is part of building a different model of business - one much more interested in the greater good and the flourishing of all people rather than viewing business as something to tightly hold onto.

So those are my five mantras:

• Trust is paramount (in yourself and your clients)

• Growth is not measured by numbers, but by depth of trust and impact in your work

• Create a body of work rather than churning out content

• Everything is an invitation, never an expectation

• I don’t have to do this alone

I wonder if any of these feel important for you to explore or take up for yourself and your work this year? I’d love to know if they are - so do feel free to DM me on instagram @melwiggins or to reach out on email hello@melwiggins.com and let me know.

And if you are interested in working together this year to help move your business and work into a place of alignment with your values, and of profit and purpose, my invitation to you is to have a look at my Brand Builder Programme. We have a beautiful community of female business owners in there that are working through the really powerful resources and tools that I’ve put together that will bring so much more ease and clarity to your work and over the life of the fourth month programme you’ve got me with you every step of the way. The link to find out more is in the shownotes of this episode and I’d be more than happy to chat with you about whether this could be the right next step for you in developing your business and you as the business owner. You are always invited. 

WHY YOUR WORK ISN'T SELLING

It’s likely that you clicked here today because you are a business owner, you create things – products of services that you really want to get out there into the world, into the hands of people who will love them. It’s also likely that you are here because the title of this blog is looking at sales and you would love to be selling more of these wonderful, smart, helpful things that you are creating. Because ultimately, that’s what business is about, right? Making sure that your product or service generates income that can sustain and regenerate profit in your business so you can pay your bills, have fun, keep creating and doing the work you love. So…

In this blog post I want to explore some of the reasons why your work might not be selling the way you want it to. And even though this might feel this question – why is my work not selling more -  has any number of answers to it – I want to focus down into three.

I’ve been working with hundreds of businesses over the last six years and I know how tricky selling is, especially for women, so I have witnessed first hand (in my own business) and in so many others the common stuff that gets in the way of seeing those sales come in. And so in this post I want to offer my top three things that I see business owners often missing that are really worth a deeper consideration…

1)     Positioning

2)     Offering

3)     Visibility Vulnerability

So let’s dive in and talk about some of the practicalities – both the outer and inner stuff - that might be in the way of people lining up to buy your amazing stuff.

First up let’s consider positioning:

When I say positioning, what I’m really talking about it how you are framing your offers. This takes into account the way you are connecting, messaging, marketing and framing what it is you have to offer.

Making sales in your business is not about just getting on Instagram and putting your product or service out there, spewing off reems about what it is and crossing your fingers that someone needs it. It’s not about detailing every aspect of what your product does on your website. It takes some understanding of where people are at that might be interested in or need your product to really make the connection.

For the most part, when it comes to purchasing something, people are really interested in how something is going to make them feel. So our messaging and marketing needs to factor that in. Sure, we like to know details of the product, how much it costs, how it works, but ultimately, people connect to how a product or service is going to change something for them, or bring them a feeling. So instead of selling from a place of details, try talking and sharing more about what kind of transformation your work brings. Now, I know that lots of people out there who offer products sometimes struggle with this part. But believe me when I say that there is transformation to be found in your product. Maybe you’re thinking about how much easier it is for service providing businesses to speak to this, but it isn’t the case. Remember, people buy based on feelings. You only have to go to the grocery store on an empty stomach to see that. Or think about the last thing you bought for yourself and dig into what feeling you were after when you purchased it. For me, I bought a candle the other because I wanted to feel cozy and warm as the nights are getting colder. I want to see the dance of that glowy flicker on my mantle piece to signal that it’s time to wind down when I go to sit down at the end of a long day. I bought into the cozy feeling.

So when it comes to your work, how does what you make or create delight, surprise, bring pleasure or joy to others. How will your food make them feel nourished or like a proper luxury treat they can savour. Speak about how your pottery or your clothes or your art brings a sense of personal or individual style. How it makes people feel satisfied, adds flair to a dining table or wall or gives something a sense of feeling finessed or put together. This goes for product or service testimonials too. Make sure when you get feedback, you ask your customer or clients to talk about this aspect. Where were they before they had your work, how do they feel now? What has shifted?

Positioning means framing the feelings of your work in a way that people recognise themselves in the offer. Don’t skip this bit – it’s how we connect and speak human to human with our customers/clients.

Secondly, let’s talk about offering.

When you’ve got your positioning right, it’s time to offer. It’s time to actually provide solutions to the feelings of your customers or clients. It’s one thing to understand your customer, how they feel, what kind of benefits they are after, what transformation or feeling they are looking for but now it’s your job to step up to that with your solution, how you know your product or service can remedy that and let people have it.

What I see happening a LOT a lot a lot is that we have these offers, we know how to position them and we are excited about people wanting them or needing them and all the beauty that comes in that transaction, and so we show up and post about it on social media and expect the sales cart to go mad, to sell out quickly (this whole selling out thing is lies that we are told by hustle culture is common when it truly is rare) or that people will just find it magically and want it quickly.

It does not work like this. And this is often where a lot of us lose our nerve and start doing the slow tiptoe away from our offerings. Like, just kidding – I didn’t really create this, gotta go! We can’t just post about something once or twice and expect things to sell easily. This requires so much nerve holding, showing up and staying committed to this part of the work.

Chances are, if you have something to offer, you aren’t talking about it enough. And for a whole host of reasons that ill get into in a minute. Either you aren’t talking about it enough or you’re talking about it cryptically instead of being bold about asking people to buy from you or work with you. I want you to realistically count in your head how many times you have actively, boldly asked for the sale this week. What I’m not saying is that you have to be pushy or manipulative or cringe here – asking for the sale isn’t begging or forcing. I’m not asking you to step away from your values of authenticity or connection – I am actually asking you to step into it more. Because to know you have solutions or something of value or something that could inspire or delight or help someone and not showing up and telling people about how they can get it – that is actually not activating your values of authenticity or connection is it? By hiding your offers, using vague language or tiptoeing around your offers isn’t actually providing the authentic connection that you really can provide!

You can offer and sell your stuff clearly, with integrity every single day. You can show up on social media or to your email list every day and make sure that whoever is ready or interested in your work knows how to get it and it doesn’t have to mean anything you might be making it mean about you. Please do not ghost your community when you think no one wants what you have to offer – show up for them and for yourself and keep letting those who may need to know what you have to offer. Do it regularly, do it often and do it with conviction because you believe in your own work.

And this brings me to my final point: Vulnerability

That’s the feelings that come up with this stuff. The vulnerability of the offering and showing up.

It is hard internal work to plug your offers. It requires a lots of risk and vulnerability to create something you care about from a place of genuine love for your work and then hold it out into the world and say – come see this? You like it? Do you want to buy it? It’s really good! Your risk aversion department in your brain is going to be on high alert, hoping that you back down your visibility and retreat to the safety of not being seen.

To show up and sell your work or your product or service is going to require you to acknowledge that protective voice, to recognise it when you start doing the slow tiptoe away, to identify how it is showing up when it comes to sharing about your work and asking people to buy from you. Recognising how your self doubt shows up and what you tend to do when that happens is a huge component of mastering it. When you recognise it – that you tend to go quiet, start comparing, stall because of perfectionism, ghost your audience, look for validation in the wrong places, numb out, people please, shrink back in – then you can start to deploy some settling techniques to bring yourself back to your commitment to the work.

Tend to your nervous system when this happens. Reassure your risk aversion department that you are curious about how this might actually work out for you and that it doesn’t need to be on such high alert. Do the work to bring some calm reassurance back into your body and mind. Journal, get into community with other business owners who are 100% likely to be feeling the same way about this for some solidarity, hire a flipping coach and co-regulate and let them do their job of helping you maintain your loyalty to yourself and your work.

If you are finding selling your stuff isn’t working for you right now and you are stuck, frustrated, doubting yourself and your abilities – lean into these three things and see what might shift for you. And let me know if it does.

THE TROUBLE WITH HUSTLE CULTURE

I want to address Hustle Culture today because this is something that I’ve become increasingly aware of in online coaching spaces.

The idea that our productivity is measurable.

Or that if you work harder and faster and more that somehow your value increases.

It’s the message that if we just keep pushing through hard stuff, we’ll be met with success on the other side. It’s the quotes on Instagram that encourage us to ‘rise and grind’ or ‘Don’t stop when you’re tired, stop when you’re done’.

The reality is that lessons on the dangers of hustle culture and quotes like these are often learned by burnout. This message, which is often found in the entrepreurial world, dominated by masculine voices, lacks so much nuance, context and real life grounding.

We are sweeping these pressurised ideas of what it means to achieve success or go after our dreams over the lives of real people with a huge spectrum of differing responsibilities, of access, of mental health needs, of time constraints, of financial obstacles, of physical abilities. And when we hold this culture up as the one that is the pinnacle, and fob all of that contextual stuff off as ‘excuses’ then the damage is absolutely real.

It leaves people questioning their worth, the value of what they have to offer, their ability to do things, their competency and it quashes their passion, their desires and their motivation. Hustle culture has a temporary dopamine hit of motivation, but it’s not a sustainable way to work and it’s a toxic message to peddle.

So today I want to talk through four ways that I see hustle culture seeping into how we are expected to work today, why it’s a troubling message and what the alternative is.

 The problems with hustle culture and what the alternatives are

The first thing I want to raise about hustle culture is the idea that if you are someone who is building a business, a community or creating something to put out there and offer.

1)     Feeling like you need to always be on and available.

Hustle culture is not really interested in boundaries. It talks a lot about how you can’t miss opportunities, you have to seize them no matter what and offer the very best, most responsive output to your clients, customers or community.

This idea that human beings have the capacity to always be responsive to the needs of their business is dangerous and is a quick way to send your nervous system into high alert which is a really harmful state for our bodies to be in consistently.

We are not bots, we are humans. We do not owe our IG followers or inboxes quick responses. To think that we need to reply to every single question, response or request that comes our way lest we miss something is scarcity mentality dressed up as being attentive to our community.

This scarcity mentality is rife in hustle culture, but it’s often disguised as not letting opportunities go by. But behind this is the reality that often we believe that if we don’t make ourselves available at all times, if we don’t respond to every single DM, if we don’t reply to every question from potential customers or clients then they will go away and there’ll be less for us.

That’s simply not true.

They may go elsewhere but it doesn’t mean there’s less for you. I don’t know about you but I want to build a business where my clients know, appreciate and respect my boundaries about my availability to respond to them. I want them to see me as human, with complex and widespread responsibilities outside of my work. A lot of my own work around this has been about trusting that my work stands up, even when I step away from it or take breaks. It’s been about trusting that the value I have to offer isn’t connected to how available I am to be all things to all people. I wonder what shifting around you might need to do in your head or in practice to reroute the idea that you shouldn’t be expected to be on and available in your business all of the time.

2) Using guilt or shame to attract customers

The next message of hustle culture that I want to address is the practice of using guilt and shame to attract customers or clients. No no no no no.

I have seen this SO much in the online business world – the language that is put out through copy, sales pages, Instagram etc is all about focusing on the dissatisfaction and pain of the potential customer or client. It’s a technique that works, for sure. I’m not saying it doesn’t work. But using tactics to rush people into buying from you or alluding that there is something wrong with them in order to sell your stuff is manipulative at best and ethically wrong at worst and isn’t actually creating a culture of business honesty and integrity.

This kind of marketing preys on peoples vulnerabilities as a quick way to get conversions and close the sale. Again, it treats people like commodities to accumulate from. It’s scarcity driven, not authenticity driven. This type of communication comes in all different forms but usually it’s packaged up with some sort of urgent but arbitrary time frames and pricing. It also plays on language that would have you believe that without this thing, you’ll be less than, stuck, or left out.

What we need is more business owners communicating about your business from a place of trust and honesty, highlighting the value of what they do, speaking to what their product or service offers and allowing people space to make up their minds, rather than hustling people into things as a statement connected to their struggle.

3)  Assigning worth or value to your output

There is definitely something satisfying about giving your best to a project or idea, right? That is a great feeling. Knowing that you’ve committed yourself to something and seen it through and are really proud of your work. But with hustle culture looming around us we have to be careful that we aren’t conflating working hard with hustle.

Because in hustle culture, it’s more about showing that you’re working hard, glorifying your output and your ability to grind more than it is about the quality of your work and your dedication to doing a good job and preserving your capacity limits. It’s Instagram posts about how busy you are, more as a humble brag nod to how much you work. It’s a reinforcement of the idea that if you’re not struggling, you’re probably not working hard enough. Which we know is bullshit.

When we assign work or value on someone’s ability to push their mental and physical capacity to the limits or on how productive someone is, we are bending to the capitalism playbook that would have us think that the only thing that matters is accumulation and increasing the bottom line. We know that humans are made for more than just working. We were made for community, to experience pleasure, to enjoy rest, for curiosity and innovation. Not to grind away as a badge of honour to the detriment of all of those things.

For those of us who have grown up with messages about our productivity being a measure of our worthiness, it takes a great deal of unpicking. It’s hard for our systems to go from filling up empty space with stuff to do, always improving or striving for something to relaxing into the margins and being at peace with our efforts in the different seasons of life.

It takes some practicing being able to slow things down, being OK with not always doing, setting limitations to our work days and what we do. Hustle culture creates an addiction to doing and elevates it as the most important part of the human experience. Reality is, if we love what we do and we want to have energy to sustain or even regenerate ourselves in our work, we have to practice knowing what is ‘enough’ for us to take on and do so we can be fully present, attentive and aligned with our work.

4) The fall narrative that hustle is a fast track to success

Another fall out of hustle culture is the idea that there is a fast track path or quick hack for growth or success. Hustle culture will try to whisper to you that there are insider ways that you can access the next level and you can do it with speed.

It’s important that we break down exactly what it is this message wants us to hustle towards? What is the end game of hustle culture and it’s promise of “success”? Is it to make loads of money? Is it to have thousands of followers? Is it to feel more freedom? Maybe it’s not even a consideration. Maybe the end goal isn’t even something clear but feels like a slippery slope we feel we should go down if we want to feel like what we’re doing is worth something.

“Once I crack 10k followers, everyone will take me seriously”

“Once I have sold out launches I’ll be known for what I do”

These illusions of fast tracks to growth or success, however you want to define it – are a fools errand. They are often laden with risky or unfounded business advice that have big promises but no real substance.

But the real fools errand quality is that it robs us of the joy (and pain) of being a beginner, a learner, of growing with your community, of trying things out on your own terms, of factoring in your own very nuanced life, of building steady foundations to your business that feel honest to you and reflect what you want to build.

We have forgotten that there’s nothing to win here. No one is going to be crowned fastest business winner of all time. It’s not even that the goalposts will keep moving, it’s that the goalposts don’t even exist. They are a construct that keeps us feeling inadequate and competitive and have us convinced that we are always too far away from it.

There is no hack to growing your business. There is only you and your aligned, trustworthy way of showing up for your work, doing your best and letting people know how they can connect with it.

Ultimately, hustle culture leads us down the path of always having to prove ourselves. Prove that we’re good, we’re hard working, we’re worth paying attention to. Hustle culture sneaks up on those of us who are ambitious and believe we have something to offer that is valuable. What it robs us of though is the ability to be present and grateful for what we have, because it will always insist there’s more to gain.

Happiness becomes a threat to our sense of achievement because contentment has been sold to us by hustle culture as laziness.

Don’t fall for it my friends, take the longer, steadier more honest path.

Don’t give up on your ideas and your beautiful work. Honour it by putting scaffolding around it that will hold it up, that will offer you spaciousness to stay creative and in your integrity and know that I’m right along with you, trying to do the same.